Leftovers, part dos

I have an unhealthy obsession with some things. Handbags, for example.

I do not have an unhealthy obsession with candy. These people, however, do. I really like this guy's gummi dissection. I wonder if there was anything left for his kid.

Oh and also, Mentos, the Messmaker. I'm going to try this at home and I think you should too.

Now this is a clever idea. Not clever enough obviously, but clever.

If you needed a little post Halloween fright to unsettle your skittles, cue up Prez B cause apparently he thinks we're all going to catch bird flu and die.

From AOL news:

Bush said no one knows when or where a deadly strain of flu will strike but "at some point we are likely to face another pandemic."

So, ok. I just. Ok. Um.

I just want to make sure I have my list of things to be afraid of/things Bush is spending gobs of money to "protect me from."

(1) Terror. Worldwide, at home, in the U.S. Except Saddam. He's eating doritoes in the slammer, and we can all feel good about that.
2) Natural disasters everywhere (NDE's). But keep traveling and driving around, cause it's keeping the boysin Texas happy
(3) Disease. All kinds. No exceptions, but mostly the flu because I have a little deal (get it?) with pharmaceutical companies
(4) Drugs. From heroin in Afghanistan to candy bars made of hash. See before-mentioned pharmacy deal.


Pop quiz: What's the difference between a pandemic and an epidemic? Do you know?

No, of course not. And neither does Prezzy.

All he knows is that it sounds SCARY and that anything that is scary is (a) easy to get money for and (b) fun to talk about cause it gets people all rowled up and forgetting about other fuck ups.

It's like this. When I was a kid, any time I'd want to do something illegal, I'd create a "problem" for my brother. The parents would be so caught up in dealing with his "problem" that I could pretty much hang the hag next door from a tree out front and no one would notice.

That is all.